The Reframe

Hearing myself talk to myself can sometimes be so sickening. So harsh & hurtful. It’s a repetition of ways I’ve learned; being spoken to or have heard others speak to themselves or each other not to mention the gulf of messages from dominant culture.

 And, of course, the more I do it, the more it’s just a repetition of myself, berating myself, feeding the machine. A pathway getting well worn by negative self-talk viruses on the war path to my jugular.

 Critical. I’ve learned in my practice to accept, respect and hold compassion for the imperfections of my patients. I hear their own self talk; see the little evils of negativity, the violent language.

 It’s easier to see it from a distance and know it for what it is; learned behaviours, stories, frameworks that keep us trickling through a pattern of self-doubt & sabotage. I’ve had to seek out people to help me identify my own blind spots. Thank you everyone who’s been there!

 The battle has been fierce & I know that we are all facing our viruses/daemons in some way, even if the way is not facing them at all. It’s easy to think of a drug or alcohol addiction or a deep dangerous infection.

 We don’t as quickly associate negative self-talk or limiting beliefs. However, these are actually the most damaging. It’s these unseen constant nagging eruptions that keeps up in the loop of reaching for something outside ourselves to make us feel okay; drugs, pills, people, food, Facebook!

 Today I am offering you 3 keys of the reframe. It’s been a while for this to come fully into my consciousness but now that it’s arrived I want to put it out there on the table for you to tap into.

 1.      Start to see them for what they are. You don’t have to know where they are coming from, however, it’s important to see these negative notes fly onto your screen. You will become more conscious once you begin detecting these little fucking viruses.

2.      Enable virus protection. Honestly, fuck those notes! You see them coming & you are all over that shit. “Thanks for coming out, I see you. Don’t let the door hit you on the way out!” Because you are busy being an imperfect human living a life full of all kinds of experiences and this is just one. So, notice it and keep going in the direction of your dreams.

3.      The reframe opportunity. “Oh wow, look at that, I am my own virus scanner! Killing it;)”. There will likely be a little backlash from the viruses, like the itch from the mosquitos that suck your blood, releasing a poison into your body to make the blood pour from your veins, easier for them to gobble up. The viruses will bully you into believing that you in fact need them & they are keeping you safe. Don’t fall for that shit. Go back to step 1 & repeat.

 The undertaking can seam daunting at the start but it’s where you’ll end up that will change your perspective. So, just get started. Deflect one negative thought, squashing one persistent virus at a time can reinforce your reframe skills making you a pro bullshit detector as the days go on. And the days will go on :-)

 What I can share from tracking my negative self-talk to the foul swamps of my unconscious is; you aren’t the first to get stuck in it, you won’t be the last & you’ve got all the shit you need there to transform your life!